Seven signs your partner is cheating
We hate to be the bearers of bad news but men can, and do cheat. And if there's anything to take from the relationship of Made In Chelsea's Louise Thompson and dirty dawg Spencer Matthews, guys are pretty outrageous about it too.
1. He's acting odd around his laptop and phone
But don't worry there are things you can watch out for. Is he being weird with his phone? Does he come home at odd times with no explanation? Or is there something just not right with him that you can't put your finger on?
You might just be being paranoid, but if you seriously think your guy is doing the dirty it's time to wake up and look for the signs your partner is cheating.
Christine Northam, Relate Counsellor says: "Just because you feel that someone is cheating, doesn't meant that they are, but you can use your instinct to guide your suspicions."
So if your gut is telling you he's playing away we say listen, then look at the top seven signs your partner is cheating to set those suspicions straight.
One of the top signs to look out for is if he's acting bizarrely around his phone, laptop and/or Facebook account. If he suddenly changes his passwords, erases his web history, or gets tetchy when you go near anywhere near any of them then hear the warning bells.
“Many people who are having affairs are found out by their mobile phone records, which will typically have numerous calls to the same person,” says family therapist Donna Tonrey.
“Also, email and internet records often are a give-away as to what is happening.”
The internet and mobile phones are the easiest way for men to play away and if he's got something to hide, he'll find a way of hiding it so watch out when things start to look suspicious.
2. Less sex
It might sound quite obvious but when the sex starts to slow-down or stop altogether then it could be a sign that he's interesred in someone else.
However, Christine says: "If he's having an affair, he might actually be more interested in sex." All that added action could cause your own sex lives to liven up a bit.
Basically if you see a sudden change in his moves in the bedroom or attitude to sex then it could signal that something is up.
3. Changes in habits
Acting out of character for no reason is another sign that your man might be playing away.
Danine Manette, author of Ultimate Betrayal: Recognizing, Uncovering and Dealing with Infidelity says: “He’s most likely cheating if he begins leaving earlier for work, staying later, taking longer or going more often.”
Also pay attention to how much time he spends away from home, going to 'play golf' or 'to the pub' might not be as innocent as it' sounds. “If his hobbies become more frequent and tend to last longer than before then it could be a sign to panic,” Danine adds.
Lastly, be extra suspicious if he is unreachable when he is away from home. “If he says he's working late, but doesn't pick up his phone or read his text, that's a bad sign,” says Dr. Danine.
4. Unexplained credit card bills or expenses
Even if your partner is not buying gifts and hotel stays for his new lady friend, you may notice charges for fancy late-night meals.
“Unidentifiable charges on his credit card are often the clue that catches him,” says Dr.Danine. If you're looking for ways to catch him out then looking at his bills and receipts and making sure all his stories match up.
If he says he went for a run and you see a charge for an expensive dinner, you’ve caught him red-handed.
5. He starts to lose weight and buy new clothes
If your typically dishevelled significant other begins a new vigorous exercise regime and dresses better, he either has a renewed outlook on vanity or he’s being unfaithful.
“If a man takes a new interest in wardrobe, hair, nails, skin, he might be trying to attract the attention of another woman.” says psychologist Stephanie Buehler. New suits, shoes and cologne are clues that he may be playing away.
6. Changes in his attitude towards you
Your once lovable partner now picks fights with you and criticizes even the littlest things that you do or how you look.
He may be looking for ways to get out of the relationship, or worse still, “He may be comparing you to the new girl,” maintains Danine.
On the other hand, it’s also cause for concern if he is abnormally sweet and caring towards you. Those lovely dozen roses every week signal that either he feels guilty about his transgressions, or is thankful you haven’t figured him out yet!
7. Your female instinct
Even with all these warning bells ringing in your head, no sign is more revealing than the feeling in your gut.
Danine says, “You know your partner better than anyone else and you will be the first to notice changes in behaviour (working out more, more irritable than usual, increased/decreased sexual appetite), changes in schedule (traveling more, spending more time away, etc), and changes in the way he interacts with you in general."
“Most women report that in retrospect they saw the signs but either ignored them or explained them away." she adds.
Instead of disregarding the warnings, open a line of communication with your partner about your feelings, talk to him about your concerns and hopefully you both will be the better for it.