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Made In Chelsea Season 5: Spencer tells Andy "stop thinking with your d*ck!"

Francesca Menato Published by Francesca Menato
Published on 14 May 2013

It was the inevitable moving on episode; Lucy Watson and Spencer Matthews, Louise Thompson and Andy Jordan. And true to form Lucy acted indifferent, Louise cried, Spencer acted like he was in the mafia and nostrils were flared. All in a day’s work for the Bafta winning hit, Made In Chelsea.

Last night's episode started in typically outlandish fashion - Lucy Watson and Spencer Matthews were off for lunch in Paris while Francis Boulle tried to eat an impossibly large sandwich.

Gallivanting through the streets of Paris the bad boy and bad girl of Chelsea had one of their favourite conversations once again: "You know I find you attractive..."

What was quite unsettling, was how they did appear to bring out some of the best in one another, Lucy was smiling and Spencer wasn't making odious comments.

So far, so much better than his relationship with Louise!

The pair then further discussed their opinions of one another in a classic riverside scene.

It was hard to tell exactly how Lucy was feeling as what seemed most apparent was that she was freezing cold and needed to be wearing more than just a leather jacket!

Back in London, how the other half was getting on; Louise Thompson was having a chat with Rosie and Binky and dropped the very unsurprising bomb that, yes, her and Spencer had still been hooking up.

Adding: "sleeping together most nights, that's not normal."

Whatever it is, it's not good. Although, the revelation did provoke one of the most animated faces we've ever seen from Miss Rosie Forestcue.

Binky Falstead then helpfully reminded a weepy Louise that there's a certain handsome local lad that would be very happy to ease her pain.

Louise then shocked us all by acknowledging that it should not be up to another guy to make her feel ok again.

She was of course, with Andy by the end of the episode...so some short lived self-empowerment there.

So, queue Andy Jordan and his loveable best friend Stevie Johnson.

Stevie seems to make these occasional appearances, where he tells it like it is and yet remains on good terms with everyone.

We think it's got something to do with his friendly face and excellent catchphrases - just wait for his description of the vibe in the bar that follows.

So what was his contribution this time?

Well, Andy was discussing the situation with regards to his successful chat with Louise at Fran's birthday.

Stevie's response simply outlined that yes, it was going to be very awkward with Fran and yes, Spencer was going to go mad if he pursued Louise.

Classic Stevie.

We were then given the treat of Fran Newman-Young entering, all smiles for what she thought was a date but what was actually the time Andy had chosen to inform her, "I don't want you to be my girlfriend."

Brutal. Needless to say, it went down like a lead balloon.

It didn't take long though, for Andy to pick himself up and get on the phone with Louise to arrange their first official date.

The pair go bowling and have a lovely time, so lovely in fact that Louise - who insists this is not a rebound - wastes no time going back to his flat.

Lucy Watson took to Twitter last night to defend herself after Louise branded her a slut.

She said: "I'm the slutty one? Who goes home with someone on the first date?"

Fast-forward to the moment when Spencer is helpfully informed, by Francis (we're starting to think he's just a massive stirrer) about Andy's date with Louise.

Andy notes the frosty atmosphere, to which Stevie responds: "It's a butters vibe in here."

We have to admit, the vibe was not good.

After his bro-conciliation with Francis, and with support galore from the other lost boys against that "f*cking snake," Spennie got into it with Andy.

The simple point, that if Andy dated his ex-girlfriend they couldn't really be mates was one many of us could understand, the style in which he delivered this message? Questionable.

Spencer frequently told him: “you’re just thinking with your d*ck”, a claim which Andy fervently denied.

Louise has added further intrigue with her tweet: "So they edited out the punch then..."

As far as we saw, they both escaped unscathed with Spencer warning Andy: "Louise and I have always been able to have each other whenever we want."


The episode ended with a grand entrance of the new couple, Louise and Andy, hand in hand.

Fran was less than amused.

Louise then took a leaf out of Spencer's book and chose to break it down for Lucy.

If there's one thing we can applaud Lucy for, it is finally pointing out the hypocrisy coming from Spouise.

Both seem to have moved on pretty quick, and neither of them are enjoying watching it.

It was unclear what Louise was trying to do, Lucy asked her: "Are you trying to warn me or are you just telling me I'm a bitch?"

According to Twitter, "Just trying to warn you sista."

Looked like a bit of both to us...

As if all of that wasn't 'dramz' enough for one episode, Proudlock has also gained himself an enemy in the form of newbie Josh Coombs after taking an interest in his ex Phoebe Lettice.

Jamie, back to hilarious form last night, helpfully pointed out the reasons why he may not be Prudder's biggest fan: "You fired him and you stole his bird."

Josh's attitude to the whole thing seemed fairly uncompromising; Proudlock had been "snaky" - so many snakes in Chelsea - and Phoebe, he simply told: "go f*ck yourself."

Well, if the Baftas were anything to go by these new relationships are here to stay, we're not sure about Mr and Mrs Fashion but Spennie and Lucy were looking awfully cosy and both couples were tweeting away throughout the night.

Related tags: #Made In Chelsea


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