Premature ejaculation

  • Sex Tips 
the love machine
10 erotic role playing ideas
12 steps to the Big O
8 classic sex positions
Home > Love & Sex > Sex Tips > Men and sex

Premature ejaculation

Your friends use sofeminine, discover what they have read
While ejaculation is a synonym for male pleasure the majority of the time, when he comes too quickly it's no fun for him or his partner. We take a look at the problem of premature ejaculation.
 - Premature ejaculation

While ejaculation is a synonym for male pleasure the majority of the time, when he comes too quickly it's no fun for him or his partner. We take a look at the problem of premature ejaculation.

What is premature ejaculation?

10 seconds? One minute? Three minutes? Before or during penetration? At what point is ejaculation premature? Time is not the only factor to take into account: premature ejaculation is defined by the notion of control, or rather lack of control. A man who doesn't suffer from this problem is able to delay ejaculation to make sex last longer and to increase the intensity of orgasm. But if ejaculation becomes an uncontrollable reflex, it’s referred to as premature. Some men start having problems with this condition after a long period of completely normal sex, in which case it is known as secondary premature ejaculation. Primary premature ejaculation is a problem that a man suffers from ever since becoming sexually active.

A common but sensitive problem
Far from being an illness, premature ejaculation is still a handicap for men who suffer from it. One out of three men are affected, and only 8% of them manage to talk about it. And women are often too afraid of causing guilt or oppressing their partner to talk about it. Frustration, incomprehension and psychological blocks can also arise and lead to problems: in a third of cases, premature ejaculation causes a relationship to end. There are, however, underlying causes for this problem and ways to treat it.

Physical causes

In rare cases, the causes can be of a physical nature: inflammation of the urethra, difficulty retracting the foreskin (phimosis), or a short foreskin.
Dutch researchers have proved that serotonin receptors, situated in the central nervous system, are less sensitive in men who suffer from premature ejaculation, and prevent them from delaying their climax.

Psychological factors

The main causes seem to be psychological and behaviour-related. A man’s first sexual encounter often brings about worry over ejaculation of the fear of 'failure'.
More generally, performing to expectations and the fear of disappointing a partner, particularly if the woman seems more experienced, can lead to loss of control. Anxiety and tiredness are often a cause of premature ejaculation, but if a man has only had a few sexual encounters or he experiences a lot of emotional tension, this should also be taken into account. Relationship problems can also cause difficulties in controlling ejaculation.

How to deal with and stop premature ejaculation
- The first step is to talk: the woman has a role to play here because she can help her partner get rid of his fear of failure by reassuring him.
- Increasing the frequency that you make love might also help him delay his ejaculation.
- There are two self-control techniques that will help during sex: “stop and go” which requires the man to concentrate on his sensations and to signal to the woman to stop moving so that he doesn't climax too soon, then resuming. The “squeeze” method involves him (or his partner) firmly squeezing the end of the penis when premature ejaculation is imminent.
- If these techniques don’t work, seeing a doctor together could solve the problem. Your doctor might, amongst other things, prescribe antidepressants that act on the spinal cord to block ejaculation until the time is right.

Love & Sex Editor
22/01/2008 11:33:00
Rank this guide: 

Don't miss...
30 of our favourite romantic quotesHow to have good sex every day of the week
Celebrity Men with Glasses10 of the hottest shower sex tips and positions
Latest… 16/04/2014
Love & Sex News
10 Reasons Why Having The Same Partner Forever Does Wonders For Your Sex Life
Protein Shakes And Nandos? 26 Signs He's A Basic B*tch
25 Signs You're In A Dead End Relationship (And Need To End It NOW)
When You're Not His Only Girlfriend: Dealing With Friends Of The Opposite Sex
All Love & Sex news
Erotic games: 5 ideas to spice up your sex life
What is an open relationship?
Female masturbation: Tips to take you over the edge
How to choose a wedding celebrant
See all Love & Sex guides
Video: The secrets behind the way you hold your drink
See all Love & Sex videos

Don't miss out!

...Join our newsletter
Get the sofeminine latest straight to your inbox
Find us on...

Copyright © 1999-2014
This week: Food & Drink Special : recipes from A to Z, by country, by duration, by type - Surnames - E-cards
Axel Springer Group: