Set yourself goals

Having projects and goals is a way of pushing yourself to take action and realising that where there's a will, there's a way! "Having confidence in yourself comes from taking risks", highlights Isabelle Filliozat. "Setting yourself a little challenge every day will soon increase your confidence in your own abilities".

What to do: Set yourself a list of clear, attainable goals that only you can achieve (that don't depend on others). Don't get into wishful thinking or set goals that revolve around othere - meeting a Brad Pitt lookalike or getting a 40% payrise are probably unrealistic. Use the first person singular.

For example: your colleague kindly Laura invites you to her birthday party, but you're panicking because you won't know anyone and you don't want to feel like a loser. Instead of turning down her invitation with a feeble excuse she'll see straight through ("I can't go, the cat's ill"), make the effort to go and set yourself a goal, such as: "I'll start conversation with a stranger" or "I'll approach a group of people and join them".

Tip: Bit by bit, as you achieve your goals, gradually increase the difficulty and frequency of your challenges. After you've gone to the party where you didn't know anyone and had a great time, try setting foot into a swanky boutique you've never dared go on and ask to try on some clothes.