The keys to a good sex life

Are love and sexual desire linked?
No, not necessarily. You can easily love someone but you might not fancy them at a moment in time. In the same way, you can fancy someone you don't love. That's why we shouldn't worry about barren periods in relationships where we don't feel as much desire for one another: it's very common and it happens to everyone. We all have our ups and downs, and after several years together it's normal not to have the same sexual impulses as you did at the beginning. As the years go by, it's good to organise your sex lives and anticipate when you're going to have sex, for example every Saturday night. Arrange to go out for dinner, to the cinema or theatre, and plan to have sex afterwards. There's nothing bad about planning; in fact, it's good for a relationship. If you've been together for 10 years, you're not going to have the same sexual desire as you did when you'd only just met. Things change!  

Is communication the key to sexual fulfilment? 
Of course. You have to say what you like, what you don't like, what you want and what you don't want. But it's also important to talk about sex outside of lovemaking itself, so that you have a chance to think about it properly. This enriches your relationship.

Your advice for a happy sex life? 
Take your time to progress! Time is your best friend when it comes to sex. Be curious and don't be shy about exploring all the possibilities. Sexuality isn't something animal or instinctive. If it doesn't feel good, don't get discouraged and persevere. And don't believe what you hear: the number of notches on your bedpost doesn't mean a thing. When you stay with the same partner for a long time, you take the time to discover each other and get to know each other better.