We have to tell them what we want

If you want him to be a good lover, you need to tell him what you want - he's never, ever going to guess! That whole 'if you love each other, you don't need to know what the other is thinking?' Total rubbish, especially where sex is concerned. 

Looking lovingly into each other's eyes is all very well, but when you get down to it, male intuitition = approximately zero. Show him a bit of your feminine intuition for inspiration - you won't be disappointed!