'Dirty Dancing' star Patrick Swayze says fighting his pancreatic cancer is like "going through hell".
Patrick Swayze says fighting cancer is like "going through hell".
The 56-year-old 'Dirty Dancing' star - who was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in 2008 - revealed the disease makes him angry and scared.
He said: "There's a lot of fear here. Yeah, I'm scared. Yeah, I'm angry. Yeah, I'm asking why me. Yeah, I'm all this stuff. You can bet that I'm going through hell. And I've only seen the beginning of it."
The star "doesn't know" if he fears death, but admits the prospect has made him question his beliefs.
He explained: "I don't know what's on the other side. I like to believe that I've got a lot of guardian warriors on my shoulder, including my dad, so I'm trying to shut up and let my angels speak to me and tell me what I'm supposed to do."
The actor started to feel sick in late 2007, and by New Year's Eve, a glass of champagne felt like "pouring acid on an open wound".
Before long, his indigestion became "gigantic and constant" and he noticed he was losing weight.
He revealed in an interview with Barbara Walters: "I dropped about 20lbs in the blink of an eye."
For the past year, Swayze has fought his cancer with chemotherapy and experimental medications, but despite how gruelling it is the actor is determined not to give up.
He said: "What winning is to me is not giving up, not matter what's thrown at me. And I can keep going." | 
