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'I Have Nothing' To Wear & Get A Room!': 30 Thoughts Every Girl Has On New Year's Eve

by Lareese Craig ,
'I Have Nothing' To Wear & Get A Room!': 30 Thoughts Every Girl Has On New Year's Eve

Surprise! It's almost time for the most overrated night of the year. You know when you run into your low-life ex, pay an arm and a leg to have drinks spilled all over your effing expensive dress and go home steaming drunk, poorer than you ever realised was possible and more single than you've ever been. Care to raise a glass to 2016? Here's the 30 thoughts every girl has on New Year's Eve.

1. I have nothing to wear

Yes we have clothes but we've worn them before duh #girllogic

2. Massively regretting buying this dress

What was I thinking? There is nothing nice about this dress.

3. What the hell did I eat over Christmas?!

If ANYTHING could fit then that would be great.

4. I hope it's going to be good...

But you know, mostly it won't be.

5. Hair up, hair down

Do I go with a slick rick pony featuring a centre parting or do I go less is more, Jennifer Aniston, this is just how my hair sits style? Decisions.

6. Where did my spanx get to?

Cannot wait to squash my organs into those later. Maybe I'll wear two pairs and look double skinny/ like a sausage trying to escape from the pastry. Here's hoping tonight doesn't involve knicker flashing.

7. OMG who am I gonna get to stick my lashes on?

Even with tweezers and a magnifying mirror this girl needs some help #thirdworldproblems

8. Single life sucks

2016 will bring me a boyfriend.

9. What if someone else is wearing the same dress?

Oh the horror. The shame. Damn you Topshop.

10. I should probably start getting ready soon it's getting late...

She says 8 hours before night out commences.

11. Shall I wear my hair curly or straight?

Curly says I'm cute and kissable. Let's go with that.

12. Need to start predrinking

Time to look in the cupboard to see what leftover alcohol will a) get us drunk quickly and b) not make our tongue go green. A goblet of of gin it is!

13. The Djs kinda cute

Is he though, is he?

14. Is that who I think it is?

He's seen me and he's coming over. This could be the only chance I get to throw a drink over his sweaty little face but it's NYE and somebody made a resolution to be nicer didn't they. Arg, F you moral compass F you.

15. Will I get a New Year's kiss?

Second thoughts I could do without tequila flavoured slobber all over my face.

16. Yes, shots for everyone

*Hobbles over to mates with the most horrific concoction of cheap and nasty drinks*

17. Cannot walk straight

Do not attempt to flirt with bouncer.

18. That girl in the toilet was SO sweet

I genuinely think we could have been separated at birth.

19. Have I missed the countdown?

Or am I that drunk that I did one all on my own in the toilet. Whilst puking.

20. I LOVE this song

Beyonce is all you need to make you lose your freaking cool.

21. When is it an appropriate time to tell everyone that I'm a smoker now

All those years of standing outside shivering like a lost part next to your smoker friends... they've driven you to this. Blame them.

22. Yuck, all I'm seeing is PDA couples everywhere. Seriously.

23. Oh there's that girl I stalk on Instagram

Hide. Hide now.

24. Oh goody the countdown

I can't wait to not be kissed.

25. Food would be good

Pizza, kebab, fries. Oh my those chubby salty fries. It's like I've never eaten before.

26. Good thing taxis are cheap on NYE

Eyes. Are. Watering.

27. And fast

Love getting home at sunrise.

28. Gotta peel these eyelashes off

Places them in palm of hand and attempts to pay taxi driver with them.

29. Jees Louise how much did I spend?

These can't be all MY receipts. Gulp.

30. NEVER AGAIN

Next year it's all about the sofa, soaps and a box of minty Matchmakers. Might even push the boat out with some sparklers.

This article was written by Lareese Craig tweet her @LareeseCraig

Your thoughts on New Year's Eve? Tweet us @sofeminineUK

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Lareese Craig
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