1. Enthusiastically declaring 'I'm so ready for knitwear season'
Only for the novelty of wearing oversized jumpers to be compromised by the sub-zero twice-daily walk to the bus stop.
2. Forever replacing umbrellas left on public transport
3. But somehow never having one when you need it, always when you don't
Sadly, you look more soggy crisp than Selena Gomez.
4. The impossible task of whittling your 10-plus coat wishlist down to two
5. Deciding on two priceier-than-you-bugeted-for 'classic styles' that you're convinced you’ll wear next autumn, only for you to declare said items "so last year" come 2017
6. Desperately resisting the urge to write basic-bitch ‘first pumpkin-spiced latte of the season’ Instagram captions
7. Spending 50% of the time you're awake thinking about all things Halloween
8. Only for your fancy dress costume to be a last-minute bin-bag-over-the-head job
9. Convincing yourself it’s far too cold to walk the two minutes down the road to the gym
10. But you’re willing to brave the Arctic conditions for the chocolate run
11. Convincing yourself you deserve to eat carbs like they’re going out of supply
Humans need insulation, too.
12. Enforcing a strict ban on Christmas chat until 1st December
13. Only for it to become your one topic of conversation from then on
Ten heads are better than one when it comes to buying your dad's gift, right?
14. Justifying spending your Christmas-present budget on new dresses
What's party season without a new party dress for each party?
15. Privately celebrating not having to shave from your eyebrows down every time you step in the shower
16. Realising every single pair of tights you own is riddled with holes or just plain bobbly
You'd rather gouge your own eyes out than face the essential trip to Primark at high season.
17. Getting irrationally excited about reuniting with the winter wardrobe you’ve forgotten about
Oh hey, 'I only do mornings on 25th December' jumper.
18. Only for you to hate everything, forcing your hand to asos.com
*Adds 10 very similar jumpers to basket*
19. Sounding like a broken record about the fact the changing seasons are wrecking havoc with your otherwise flawless skin
20. Becoming the hermit you've always dreamed of being
Refusing to leave the house unless it's 100% necessary and even then, only if it's not cold which it will be.
21. Breaking your promise not to post 'obligatory' #autumn cliche pictures on Instagram
22. Lamenting every person with a birthday in November and December
I'm not made of money.
23. Getting Irrationally excited about buying a whole new autumn/winter wardrobe only for you to throw five old jumpers over everything
'Cos comfort > style.
24. Embracing you 'fuller figure'... until January
When you'll declare you're on a detox that'll last a week if you're lucky.
How many of the above are you guilty? 'Fess up @soFeminineUK
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