Now to clear things up, that's not to say that I have any idea what it's actually like to be a mother right now. Though I definitely plan to have children several years down the road, as a currently unmarried, childless woman, I myself am not a cool mum (though I like to think I'm pretty cool in general).
Instead however, thanks to the wonderful and empowered women that surround me in my life, whether my peers, relatives, or even co-workers, I like to think that I can pretty much spot those pre-baby individuals who will one day become the Mrs. Georges of the world à la "Mean Girls," the Angelina Jolies, and if it's not already obvious, my own mum.
These are the signs that surely prove one day you're gonna be one really cool mum.
You're Always a Great Listener
When it comes down to it, you're the girl who will listen to your friends for hours on end about their problems and be totally fine with it. In fact, you like being that person who they feel comfortable talking to about anything and everything because you enjoy giving guidance and helping out when needed.
Although I'm not yet a mum, I do know what it's like to be a teen girl going through her confused, awkward and bratty stage, and have witnessed the struggle of my own mum having to deal with me. Not to mention we've reflected on that part of my life and laughed about it together. Through all my friend drama, heartbreaks and random issues with school, my mum has been there for me, and I see that part of her in many of my close girl friends. If you can't handle listening to your own friends' issues now, then what are you going to do when your children are going through puberty?
Yet You Know When NOT to Take Sides
"You're only asking my opinion to confirm your own." Ladies, let's be real: We've all received this response to our problems from both our mothers and friends before because we just wanted them to tell us we were right even if we were wrong. I hate to admit it, but taking your BFF's side on an issue just because she's your BFF isn't the answer to everything. You have to know when to put her in her place sometimes and let her know if she's being irrational about something. For example, did your bestie's frenemy really wear the exact same outfit as her to that party on purpose or was it just a mere coincidence? Is she flirting with your friend's boyfriend or is she actually just being friendly? If you can be realistic about things like that, you'll likely be a great parent. After all, you can't hold your child's hand forever.
Friends Come to You For Fashion Advice
Okay, so there's really nothing better than having a mum who knows everything there is about the coolest trends and best new looks, but that's actually not what I mean by "fashion advice." However, if you're the type of person who can openly tell her friend what looks fabulous on her or that her dress might be a little too risque to meet her boyfriend's parents in, then you'll have no problem advising your future child on their clothing choices as well. That doesn't always mean you'll successfully prevent your kids from wearing their Halloween costumes to class on a completely random day in December, but at least they'll know you're looking out for them and will definitely appreciate it once they get older.
You're Laid-back but Still Responsible
If anything, you're the type of person who's super chill, always seems relaxed, and is game for anything -- but you also have all your sh*t together. Though I don't necessarily want to say I'm against the "tiger mum" parenting style (again, I'm not a mum yet and to each his own), a recent study released by researchers at PsychTests revealed that authoritarian parenting doesn't always produce well-behaved children.
So when it comes time to produce those parenting skills, you know when to be a friend to your child but also when to be a mum. Sure you'll let your kid take that weekend trip with her pals, but if (s)he's been slacking off at school then s(he) can kiss that goodbye. It's all about give and take and you have to know when to allow people freedom in their lives (and especially your own) while also learning how to put your foot down if necessary. Being a cool mum doesn't mean you just let your children do whatever they want when they feel like it, but instead, you teach them the value of responsibility as well.
You Know When to Simply Laugh Things Off
There are just some things in this world that no one, not even our parents can prepare us for. I mean you knew deep down you probably wouldn't actually marry your year 8 boyfriend and there would be other fish in the sea, but you probably still cried after your first real heartbreak anyway. Yet as you grew and experienced various obstacles like that in your life, you eventually learned when you just had to brush things off and save the tears and/or anger for another day.
Likewise, when you finally become a mum, you'll know how to choose your battles. Not every argument is worth it, and thanks to your ability to prioritise things like this in your childless state now, you'll be able to do the same with your future mini-yous.
You Embrace Quirky People & They're Probably Your Friends
If you're not already the oddball in your group, you probably have at least one or two of them as your besties. I know that between reciting lines from "Forrest Gump" together and singing Disney songs during the insanity that is exams week, both my best friend and I were the "weird" friends. Sometimes you just have to let it all out even if people look at you like you're crazy.
If you can just let go from time to time and embrace the weirdo within yourself, it's easier to accept others' quirky antics as well. Plus, we all know that kids go through an awkward phase at some point in their lives, so understanding where that comes from is important toward being a cool mum. So your child wants to shop at Hot Topic and wear dark makeup and skinny jeans all the time (I maybe did this)? No problem!
You'll Defend Your Loved Ones
If anyone tries to hurt one of your own, you'll always back them up. You'll never just stand by and let someone bully one of your girls or have some horrible guy ruin your friend's life. When it comes to the people you love, it's natural for you to find yourself in mama bear mode even though you're not actually a mum yet. This feeling to support and protect those who are close to you likely reflects how you'll act the instant you have a little one on the way.
What do you think makes a cool mum? Tweet us @sofeminineUK
This article was written by Emma Goddard - you can follow her @egoddardhokie
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