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Tom Hardy's Old MySpace Profile Is The Best Thing The Internet Has Given Us

by Emmy Griffiths Published on 2 June 2015
Tom Hardy's Old MySpace Profile Is The Best Thing The Internet Has Given Us

Check out Tom Hardy. Hollywood’s hottest action hero who always speaks with the depth and sincerity of the serious actor we all know, respect and admire him to be. So when Tom Hardy’s old MySpace page was recently rediscovered, it was a chance to see who he was before he came big. Who was he, you ask? Literally an hilarious human being.

Just look at Tom Hardy.

He is sooo suave and attractive

But before he became an actor, like many of us, had MySpace

And like many of us, he probably now regrets it

But UNLIKE many of us, he didn’t have the good sense to delete his embarrassing memories before applying for graduate jobs

Such as this

And we hate to be ‘that guy’, but we have some questions about his package

For an added bonus, THIS is his About Me:

I never lie. If you suck you suck..If you’re good I take my hat off and I’m all over you. I’ll bend over backwards to help anyone of their word.. f*ck me around I’ll let it go I’m not here for stuff I’m here to live and give whatever it is I can to nourish rather than to take and move on, I’m course and straight, I act for a living now adopting characters for money, it is a languague I was born into, I always wanted to be someone else, it isn’t rocket science it’s easy, now that I’ve made amends for lying to myself, it is a trade craft nothing more, I pray I don’t get caught up “living the dream.” such a lonely place. having said that; your best like my best just isn’t good enough. ever, no scarface syndrome here, no resting on laurels, there is always work to do, I’ll clean up my side of the street promptly admitting where I am wrong, the work doesn’t stop.

I’m Grateful, arrogant self centred, tenacious, versatile, honest, honourable, loyal, loving, gentle, consistent, reliable, focussed, prideful, passionate and nuts. I have a head like a disco ball, if I say I’ll do something, unless I absolutely can’t it gets done, I never give up on humanity, I love people. I want to see communities stand up, honest and open, flexing to the fullest of their capabilities and combined usefullness. happy. I laugh at bullies. I am reactionary but I have learned to hold my tongue and my trigger finger. Man made mistakes take lives from those that deserve to recover in time, there is always another way forward better even if it is around the side or back, I try to find it. the mind is like a parachute it will only work when it is opened.

I am often afraid. So I have to share.I want to help, it’s not my business to judge, I make mistakes, I stand corrected, I accept casualties and walk with hope because I f*cking LOVE. I could so easily be dead. My head is like a dangerous neighbourhood I should never be in it without an appropriate adult. left to my own devices I’ll crash the motor. Religion to me is a neccesssary device for the presence of combined faith, branded for those who want to get into heaven, I have to have faith, but I chose the path of spirituality, spirituality seems to me to be for those who’ve been to Hell. I don’t want to go back there. I am a goldfish walking through a desert. Thank you H.P for my life. I want to work and be useful, be part of the solution and not the problem…what a load of self satisfied smug and charmless tatter x

Don't worry Tom, we're sure no one will remember this by next week...

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Emmy Griffiths
Emmy Griffiths
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