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Women in Focus

How To Stop Yourself From Ruining Your Life

by Vivian KELLY Published on 12 December 2014

Wanna know how to live a happy care-free life? It's simple. There are no rules. Stop giving yourself grief about the little things and start appreciating what you have. Life can be a beautiful thing people BUT only if you let it be! Here are 22 ways to stop you from ruining your own life...

1. Negativity is toxic

As soon as you start filling your mind with toxic thoughts everything around you becomes infected. Negativity is like a drug, it takes over every cell and thought in your body until you no longer give a crap about life. Tomorrow when you wake up, choose happiness.

2. Appreciate love

Imagine a life without, family, friends, your partner or children? What would life be to you?

You always hear people saying 'money makes you happy' and while it may seem so at first, it's only a temporary high. That's why there are tons of billionaire celebs going to rehab for depression and drug addiction because they're desperate to enjoy all the things that REALLY matter in life (which don't come with a price tag).

3. Crack a smile

It's not often you come across a stranger smiling at you, but when you do it feels great. Smile more often. It's small things like this that can turn somebody's day around completely, including yours. We can all do with a bit more of this feel good feeling in our lives.

4. Stop. And look around you.

I'm tired of people calling their hometown or city a 'shit hole'. STOP. And look around you. What do you see?

I see a life worth living. Every flower, every animal, every person, life is a beautiful thing. Take a moment to appreciate the world around you and say thank you.

5. Take time

Life is so much better when we're not hung up on what 'we need to do' all the time. Plan your day to suits your needs. Don't wake up 20 minutes before you're meant to be out the door. That only causes panic, stress and bitterness.

​Get up a bit earlier and take the time to enjoy your morning. Have a cup of tea or coffee, sit back and check your social media, read the news, have a long hot shower, catch up on Netflix and take your time getting ready. Life isn't so bad once you start taking control.

6. Say F**k it

Stop worrying about the little things. No one is forcing you to do anything. People always think, 'I have to do this, I have no choice', but that's where they're wrong. It's YOUR life, YOUR choice. And sometimes, you just need to say F IT. Do what you want!

7. Know your worth

Time and time again we let people into our lives who trample our hearts and disrespect us and even after they've caused us pain we still go for the same old douchebags. Accept nothing less than you deserve.

8. Be selfish

Sometimes you need to be! Think about what you need, what you want, what's best for YOU and most importantly quit trying to people please! It won't make you happy.

9. Don’t be a bitch

You're not in high school any more. All that juvenile crap that you dealt with in school should not be happening in real life, but you'll always run into other people who will still put on the act. Don't drag yourself down to their level.

10. Don't become fixated with money

Sure, it's great at making us miserable, but not so good at keeping us happy. This includes those who are so-called 'good with their money' too. You know, the one's that save every last penny... but for what? It's great to save, but only in moderation. You can't take money to the grave with you - remember that.

11. Look at the good, not the bad

There will be a time in your life when something tragic will happen. All those people you pitied because the worst had happened? Don't - they don't want your sympathy. Recognise their strength. It takes a lot of heartache to lose someone you care about and even more to come out of it sane.

If something happens don't feel sorry for yourself, remember that there is always someone suffering more than you. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Embrace what you have and cherish the memories.

12. Be your best friend

If you find yourself with nothing to do, don't pester your friends to entertain you, just chill out and enjoy your own company for once. If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.

13. Comparison is the thief of joy

The worst thing you can do is compare yourself to others. But there will always be someone richer, smarter and more successful than you. Life isn't a competition. Life is about living life to the fullest with no expectations. We're all in different chapters of our life - focus on YOU not them.

​14. Talk to people

It's easy to want to curl up into a little ball and just get away from life, especially when we're feeling down, but don't underestimate the value of golden friendships. Taking time out to talk about the way you feel is real therapy for body and soul.

15. If you feel it, say it

Never let that moment pass you by. The only thing holding you back is fear.

16. No bull sh*t policy

No matter how young or old, if someone is disrespecting you, make sure they know about it. Once you realise your worth and know what you deserve it's so much easier to put your foot down. Don't be afraid to take a stand - as long as you're speaking truths there is no wrong.

17. Time waits for no one

If you want something, go get it! Don't sit there waiting for the perfect moment, there is no right time, you'll never be ready. You can never get back time you wasted.

18. Learn from experiences

How would you know what warmth felt like unless you experienced the cold ? Going through tough times gives you a greater appreciation of life. Learn from it, don't sulk.

19. Kill fear

Are you afraid it might not work out? Are you afraid of the consequences? Just f**king do it already. You only hear people saying they regret the things they never did.

20. Show love

We all need someone to make us feel safe, heard and understood. Go home and spoon your partner, hug your mum when you see her and say I LOVE YOU as much as you can - because when that moment comes and you don't get a chance to say good bye, there's no chance of going back.

21. And spread it

Love doesn't just come down to relationships, parents or children - love is everywhere and it can be expressed in the simplest of ways. Smile, say thank you, hold the door for someone, help someone with directions. That's love too!

22. Find your calling

What drives you? Some people know when they're young, others won't until their twenties or thirties and even then, much later. But there's nothing wrong with that, do more of what makes you happy and live by it.

If you’re reading this…smile

YOU'RE ALIVE!

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Stop overthinking and starting living! How do you live your life? Tweet us @sofeminineUK!

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by Vivian KELLY

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